On Tuesday I brought my cello in and played for a very negative class, but having driven in and lugged the thing up to my office and then down and up again to my class, I was damned if I wasn't going to play for the students, no matter how surly. Actually, I noticed as I played in our windowless, beige-walled, cruddily linoleumed-floored classroom, the students settled and slowed into a surprising silence that made the resonance of my notes sound fairly convincing. When I finished, feeling rushed because the class was meant to go to the career counseling during half of our time together, I was startled when my students, all of whom had just expressed frustration that bordered on anger over their grades, burst into applause. I asked if anyone would like to play my instrument and was surprised that two students took a stab at it, surprising themselves at how awkward it felt and how difficult it was to get a sound from the cello. It may not have been the most ideal circumstances, but I was happy that I'd done it and exposed the students to at the very least one classical music piece. They seemed to loosen up when I exposed myself in front of them and made some obvious mistakes, grimacing at what felt like bad intonation. They saw that I worked at it and wasn't perfect, and I think that may have been the best thing I could have shown them. And I didn't die when I made the mistakes!
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